Union, intimacy, and closeness make a Happy Marriage, but what if it lacks?
Marriage is considered to be a way to have sex. It increases intimacy and brings closeness between the partners. But what if a marriage lacks all this? You two live together but there is no contact, no intimacy, just a label being carried on with no fun, spark, or romance. What kind of marriage is this? In this article, we will be talking about what is sexless marriage. With a focus on its causes, consequences, and a few tips to fix a sexless marriage. It is essential to know how to deal with sexless marriage as this marriage might end you with depression and suffocation.
What is sexless marriage?
Let’s come to first what is sexless marriage, couples might be bound by the union of marriage. Marriage is the name of intimacy, companionship, and sex is a pathway to increase intimacy. But many marriages are not filled with sex or intimacy. Sexless marriage is when you don’t have more than 10 sex in a year in your marriage. It also refers to not having sex at all for very long periods like 2 to 3 years and the tenure continues. There are numerous reasons when it comes to what causes a sexless marriage, which we will discuss in the next section. Let’s know about it.
Causes of sexless marriage
There are times when we don’t know what is sexless marriage but we are in it. There are many causes of the same but we aren’t aware of it and hence the dull marriage standing on pressure or responsibility keeps going on. Here we will let you know what causes a sexless marriage.
1. Medical issues
Among different causes of sexless marriage, one of the causes of the same is medical issues. At times there are no problems between the couple, or in the idea of fantasies or understanding but medical problems become the reason couples cannot have sex. The medical issues can include erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, low libido, female sexual dysfunction, vaginismus, and many more which prohibit the couple from having sex. Males can go for the erection combo by Nature Mania to treat problems like premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction. However, consulting a doctor is necessary.
2. Lack of understanding
When it comes to what causes a sexless marriage, one of the reasons is a lack of understanding, communication, or excessive fighting between the couples. A lot of tension and stress in marriage also leads to no sex in marriage. Lack of understanding can also refer to the fact that you don’t know how to please your partner. You are not aware of the tips to instantly turn on a woman or the female partner is unable to understand your idea of sex. This lack of understanding, unnecessary fights, and unresolved issues all lead to sex marriage. Hence lack of understanding is another reason why sexless marriage can still be identified in society.
3. Different sex orientation
The causes of sexless marriage are various, among them one of the causes is sex orientation. It may not seem all known or apparent in the beginning or you may know about it but due to societal or family pressure, you end up in a marriage. Sex orientation refers to sexual identity. It is possible that your husband is a guy or asexual or you are lesbian which makes sex and marriage both difficult on both the parts. It makes the marriage sexless or you might live together, and have kids due to excessive pressure from family or society but there’s no romance, spark, or love in the marriage. It is another reason why marriages are sexless.
4. Different fantasies
There are numerous reasons what causes a sexless marriage, among them one of the reasons is having different fantasies. It is very normal and prominent to have different fantasies regarding your partner and sex and when those fantasies do not get fulfilled, sex is no longer fun or desirable. This becomes one of the reasons why marriages end up being sexless. You might not know how to satisfy your husband, or your partner may have different aspirations regarding how their partner should be or how sex should go along. The inability to have the fantasies fulfilled leads you to have an upset sexual life and hence avoid sex in your marriage.
5. Psychological issues
There are many causes of sexless marriage, one of the causes being psychological issues. We all have different fears, anxiety, and other thoughts which stop us from doing certain things. In the case of sexless marriage many times both husband and wife have certain fears or problems that stop them from going for sex. They may not know how to stop performance anxiety in males or females might not know what to do or have a fear of penetrative sex. Abuse, trauma, and poor sex experience before marriage all can contribute to a sexless marriage, and these all are psychological causes. Hence, it is essential to look after and identify them.
Consequences of sexless marriage
Having an idea about what is sexless marriage isn’t enough, at first it may seem that there are no side effects of the same but there are many ways sexless marriage affects couples. Let’s have a look at how.
1. Extramarital affair
One of the consequences of sexless marriage is extramarital affairs. The inability of partners to understand each other, different sexual orientations, and sexual fantasies often lead the partners to have an extramarital affair. The reason here usually is because the partner is unable to receive the sexual love they want from their married partners and hence they look for it outside. Emotional causes can also be one of the reasons for extramarital affairs. It is often advised to seek therapy or communication before going into extramarital affairs as it destroys a relationship. So, it is the ultimate end that happens in a sexless marriage.
2. Psychological problems
There are many ways sexless marriage affects couples, one of the ways is psychological problems. It is also the ultimate end of a sexless marriage as it gives trauma and other psychological problems to the couple. Often sexless marriages due to various reasons lead the couples to exist and survive in a suffocating union and guide them through stress, anxiety, troubled communication, fights, depression, and many more things. This is usually caused due to the lack of spark, understanding, and intimacy in the relationship which leads to disrupting sexual life and private life. The couple suffers under the responsibility of children or pressure from society.
3. A show marriage
Among the various consequences of sexless marriage, another effect of the same is a marriage continuing just for show. Due to the lack of sex, the relationship becomes hollow and there is no way out of it. Hence, in the upper level, it may seem that the marriage is working fine but the deep reality is different where the couple is just staying together for the happiness of their kids, family, or society. The marriage yields no rewards but only stress, anxiety, and suffocation. It is essential to consider going for marriage counseling to talk it through and make your marriage filled with happiness, intimacy, understanding, and romance.
How to fix a sexless marriage?
When you know what is sexless marriage and can identify its presence, it becomes essential to take a step toward it. It is important to know how to fix a sexless marriage. In this section, we will be dealing with how to handle or convert your sexless marriage into sex filled happy marriage.
1. Visit a sexologists
One of the most necessary steps in how to fix a sexless marriage is to go for sex counseling. Visiting a sexologist is the best option to understand why sex doesn’t fit in the equation of your marriage. It is one of the tips to fix a sexless marriage. Sexologists help with understanding why sex is not taking place and also deal with the problem of fantasies, sexual orientation, lack of understanding of sex, how to go with foreplay, understanding your partner’s needs, how to fulfill them, and ways you can reignite the spark in the marriage. You should not give it a second thought as it is an essential step in fixing your sexless marriage.
2. Talk it out
When it comes to how to fix a sexless marriage, communication plays a major role. It is necessary to talk things out. It is also one of the reasons why premarital counseling is necessary as before marriage you talk about what you expect from a partner, medical issues, sexual preferences, and others. It helps in deciding and fixing things before marriage. Also, after marriage, you must talk to your partner about your fantasies, desires, and other preferences. Communication eases many problems. It is one of the tips to fix a sexless marriage. So, every time you feel off or want things differently, talk it out and be clear.
Conclusion
By now you must have understood what is sexless marriage, it does not specifically mean that you don’t have sex but the number is below 10 in a year and that too might have taken place due to societal pressure. You cannot connect with your partner on a sexual level and at times even on an emotional level. There are many ways sexless marriage affects couples, it leads to extramarital affairs, and psychological problems, and marriage even becomes baggage for the couples. It might also happen that the lack of stamina even makes the male partner fear their performance. They can go for the stamina combo by Nature Mania which helps in building stamina and boosting confidence. Further, looking over how to deal with sexless marriage is essential in sex therapy.
FAQ’S
1. How to reignite the spark in a sexless marriage?
One of the consequences of sexless marriage is the lack of spark or romance that the partner tries to find outside of the relationship. If your marriage has become sexless due to boredom or dull sex then you can try the different places where you can have sex to reignite the spark. You should try to communicate and know about each other’s fantasies so that you can work together to fulfill them. This is how to add a spark to your sexual life in marriage.
2. How to recognize that marriage is sexless?
To know how to deal with sexless marriage it is essential to recognize that the marriage is sexless. The prominent sign is that you rarely have sex, intimacy, or closeness. Also, you can go for foreplay but intercourse does not take place due to different factors like premature ejaculation, fear of penetrative sex, or performance anxiety. If you are not having sex or rarely have sex and it has been a long time then you are in a sexless marriage.
3. Can marriage work without sex?
Many couples think that marriages can work without sex. Even if that happens marriage becomes mechanical and is unnecessarily dragged down for the family and society. The couple has to go through emotional hollowness and suffocation. Sexual relationships make relationships strong. Therefore it is essential to know the tips to fix a sexless marriage so that you don’t have to undergo a traumatic sexual experience or look for love outside.
4. What to do if partners have different sexual orientations or fantasies?
If partners have different sexual orientations it is essential to talk it out about your preferences and identify them. It is better to talk with elders of your family or seek therapy. In such cases ending the marriage is a better option to avoid hurting others. It is recommended to talk about it before marriage. In the case of different fantasies, communication is essential and therapy can help you understand each other. This is how to deal with sexless marriage.
5. How does sexless marriage affect both partners?
There are many ways sexless marriage affects couples. Sexless marriages cause the partners to suffer mentally and even physically since the physical needs are not fulfilled. Further, it makes the couple look to fulfill their needs outside the marriage. Also, the couples end up having fights, arguments, anxiety, stress, tension, inability to talk it through, depression, poor sex experiences, suffocation, and many other psychological problems.
